Tuesday, 6 September 2016

Trying to stay grateful is hard sometimes

I told myself earlier today that I could skip Microblog Monday this week, but I find that I can't do that. It will be too hard to go to sleep without writing something, so here I am, writing about nothing, and setting where it goes.

Both my husband and I have been hit with a nasty virus within about 36 hours, so we haven't even been able to look after each other. As always, I imagine how much harder this would be if we had children. But I think that I'm still allowed to feel miserable! The cumulative effect of this year - my mother's deterioration then death, my accident, my father-in-law's heart attacks, the slow and painful recuperation, and the results of my MRI last week (you never want to hear a Dr. say "it's not good news I'm afraid"), and now this virus - have me feeling pretty sorry for myself. I am trying to be grateful for what I have. Yes, it could be worse. But some years just suck, and I'm giving myself permission to acknowledge that.

13 comments:

  1. Get well soon!
    I know, it is hard to be grateful sometimes.

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  2. It sounds like you are doing the right thing!
    sometimes things suck and it OK to say that, it does not diminish your gratefulness.
    Sending get well vibes your way.
    I hope that you get some good sleep and soup and that this bumpy part of the path leaves its rocks behind...so there is nothing left for you to carry.

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  3. Yes, some years do suck. Take gentle care. My thoughts are with you.

    Peace.

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  4. Awww, Mali, I am sorry. :( Some years do suck (thinking of 1998-99, in my case). Hoping you are both on the mend soon.

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  5. When sick, you are allowed to feel awful on all levels. It's been a tough year for you too. So no need to try to justify needing to feel more grateful. Just focus on healing.

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  6. Oy, that's rough. Hope you get feeling better soon!

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  7. Oh no, feel better! Absolutely you are allowed to feel miserable...otherwise it's that whole evil "at least" thing. Heal up soon and feel as miserable as you'd like...viruses are awful.

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  8. 2016 can't leave fast enough for you! This has definitely been a year of sucky. I hope the remaining few months are event-less.

    I hope that you and DH get to feeling better soon! Sending some virtual chicken soup your way!

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  9. That was my 2014 - 2015. I couldn't wish it away fast enough. And then felt guilty wishing away time. Sending a hug and hope you feel better soon.

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  10. I'm sorry you are having a difficult year. Hope you feel well as soon as possible!

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  11. I struggle with the "staying grateful" narrative. On the one hand I think it's really necessary to remember all we have, but on the other hand, sometimes we need to acknowledge what is hard. There must be a way to do both at the same time, but I haven't figured out how, at least not very gracefully.

    I'm sorry you're having such a hard year. I think it's totally understandable that you feel a bit beaten down by it. Some years do that to us. I hope next year is so, so much better.

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  12. Sometimes you just have to go through it to get through it. Your resilience in hindsight will astound you.

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  13. <3 <3 <3 I hope you both are feeling much better now. I think it's totally OK to sometimes to not feel grateful. We all need to be allowed to feel poopy sometimes. Here is to an easier October <3

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