tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5725106142359702200.post9031058735626223316..comments2024-03-29T09:31:53.769+13:00Comments on No Kidding in NZ: Speaking outMalihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03928262526502319303noreply@blogger.comBlogger11125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5725106142359702200.post-70989967784865085492016-07-17T07:04:33.180+12:002016-07-17T07:04:33.180+12:00Great quote. I love this. I have been finding my v...Great quote. I love this. I have been finding my voice more lately in all aspects of my life and I will remember this when I get scared to say so.nicolehttp://nicoleciomek.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5725106142359702200.post-91306272038122659652016-03-26T10:18:55.967+13:002016-03-26T10:18:55.967+13:00I've done a lot of exploration of secrecy vs p...I've done a lot of exploration of secrecy vs privacy, and my working theory is that the difference is shame (an ingredient in the former). There is nothing wrong with privacy; in fact, I see it here as a sign of a strong sense of self and healthy boundaries. Lori Lavender Luzhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15394441222262940632noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5725106142359702200.post-65885769170425578192016-03-23T12:32:28.135+13:002016-03-23T12:32:28.135+13:00Loribeth is a variation of sorts on my real name. ...Loribeth is a variation of sorts on my real name. When I think about it, I probably should have just blogged under my real name, since it's far more common than Loribeth -- safety in numbers, etc. ;) Oh well. I agree, it IS better to speak -- but sometimes it's easier &/or safer to speak from an anonymous or semi-anonymous position. ;) loribethhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09272814565916935113noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5725106142359702200.post-83587363620818719232016-03-22T19:22:56.630+13:002016-03-22T19:22:56.630+13:00Aliases, pen names, pseudonyms.... you’re in good ...Aliases, pen names, pseudonyms.... you’re in good company with quite a number of other literary authors.<br /><br />We all know how accessible and convenient the internet can be, especially for those of us who are able to find these blogs of similar experiences, but it can also be too convenient and too accessible (and quite nasty) if you are trying to maintain a shred of privacy and decency with writing and commenting.<br /><br />I think this is part of your self-care routine. It’s the level of comfort you currently have versus putting it all out there for everyone (including friends and relatives who may stumble upon your blog uninvited) to trample over. <br />Your writing touches all of us who read it, regardless of your name.<br />Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5725106142359702200.post-54580911790230885542016-03-22T13:42:17.616+13:002016-03-22T13:42:17.616+13:00I think it would only be fraudulent if you were pr...I think it would only be fraudulent if you were pretending your name IS Mali. But I think privacy is important, too, and there are so many reasons to have that public voice and private voice. I can think of so many people who write or work under a different name.Lollipop Goldsteinhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01020874415819057995noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5725106142359702200.post-67896912019350909372016-03-22T11:34:00.187+13:002016-03-22T11:34:00.187+13:00You are not a fraud. I envy you your anonymity, be...You are not a fraud. I envy you your anonymity, because once you're out there as you...you lose the ability to be completely and totally honest. And people who are not kind (and that you know or knew) can find you. You CAN be more honest and transparent with your feelings because you don't have to worry about people you know "in real life" questioning your thoughts or remembering things differently. I think you can absolutely speak out without revealing all of yourself publicly and opening yourself up to difficulties of a different kind. (I wish I could keep everything the same but have an anonymous identity so that I could write more freely about family, or friends when there are issues... and so that I could free myself from my horrible ex-mother-in-law who every now again tries to post on my blog, proving that she reads it, and always her comment is about what a great father my ex-husband is. OH to be anonymous.) <br /><br />I think speaking the truth as Mali is not even remotely fraudulent. It is truthful, and beautiful, and free. Jesshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15868505568965284742noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5725106142359702200.post-25962609815027848342016-03-22T08:58:48.908+13:002016-03-22T08:58:48.908+13:00Not a fraud. The polar opposite.
I struggle with ...Not a fraud. The polar opposite.<br /><br />I struggle with this too. Even though I'm semi-anonymous, I worry constantly about the backlash from my words and thoughts. It's not easy to put them out there only to have them torn down.<br /><br />You are a role model. Even if you write under a pseudonym. Because you speak the truth boldly and beautifully.Cristyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04317873211902543387noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5725106142359702200.post-50842480767208320832016-03-22T06:59:04.003+13:002016-03-22T06:59:04.003+13:00Mali,
you are far far far from a fraud.
Many of ...Mali, <br />you are far far far from a fraud. <br />Many of us blog under different names, but I have always felt that it is simply self-care. We are a community that accepts people, there are many others that don't or won't. Be kind to yourself dear one.The Barrenesshttp://www.the-barreness.blogspot.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5725106142359702200.post-80358009867967907942016-03-22T03:56:20.399+13:002016-03-22T03:56:20.399+13:00I work in IT. Many years as a freelancer. I expect...I work in IT. Many years as a freelancer. I expect future employers and or colleagues to google me. And I want to give them a fair chance to respect my privacy!!<br />;-) There are too many people (search engines? criminal networks?) on the web that I cannot trust. Valeryhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10210187335704409247noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5725106142359702200.post-71199622357933078232016-03-22T01:06:48.249+13:002016-03-22T01:06:48.249+13:00You are definitely not a fraud!
This is somethi...You are definitely not a fraud! <br /><br />This is something I struggle with as well. By writing under a pseudonym I feel more at ease sharing my heart. Very few people in my real life know about our infertility and even fewer know that we'll never have children. Someday I hope to be a little more open, but I don't think I'm strong enough for that right now. BentNotBrokenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10151724076659555122noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5725106142359702200.post-47228993877238555522016-03-21T17:40:47.529+13:002016-03-21T17:40:47.529+13:00dear Mali,
no, you are not a fraud.
I also don'...dear Mali,<br />no, you are not a fraud.<br />I also don't write under my real name. <br />Since - as soon as you start writing with real name and surname, you loose freedom to write everything that lies deep in your heart. <br /><br />And we did meet in person. It was great (but too short). This is a confirmation that we are both very real.<br /><br />kind regards from Europe.Klarahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17028863974858724867noreply@blogger.com