Yesterday - in NZ - and today - in the US/Canada - it has been The Day that Should Not be Named. This year, with all the turmoil going on at home with a terminal husband, the day registered but barely. Still, last night as I was going to bed, I got a message from my niece. She's been through a lot. She's studying psychology as an adult student, and doing great, putting all her experiences and growth into the course. I'm very very proud of her.
She said:
"Wanted to say thinking of you today on Mother's Day. I cannot pretend to know what emotions get brought up on days like today. So happy Aunties day instead, love you lots."
I think that is the first time, in 24 years of Mother's Days since I lost my first pregnancy, that I've had a message from anyone outside of this community acknowledging that the day might be hard for me. Sure, I made a point of telling one or two people that is was hard, who then recognised that. My mother was one. But this was unsolicited, and just lovely to receive. She made a point of saying she's making a conscious effort to reach out to people in a small way, instead of saying nothing. Which seems to be a family trait. Or a NZ trait. Or a Western trait. Anyway, I've tried to do that too, and she reminded me it is worth continuing to do so. Trying is better than not trying.
Did I mention we are both middle children? ;-)
So even if the day is tough, and the years are silent, small changes can and do happen. And they will warm your heart when they do.
What a lovely message! I am glad you got that nice little surprise. Thank you for sharing. Hugs from rainy Switzerland <3
ReplyDeleteWarm the heart, indeed! Your niece gets a gold star for empathy and compassion. You and all our sisters were front and center in my mind all day yesterday. I made a conscious decision to stay offline, so a belated hug. xx
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