Friday, 20 May 2016

Finally, acknowledgement for No Kidding women

I'm feeling a bit nervous. Recently, I was interviewed by a major women's magazine here in New Zealand. The writer had found my blog here, and I guess she thought what I had said was interesting, and wanted to interview me for an article she was writing about women without children. I was initially a bit hesitant, especially when I learned that her focus was going to be on women who were childfree by choice. But she was aware of the numbers of women who don't have children, and wanted to see what our lives were like. This wasn't going to be one of those nasty, attack articles about the selfish and frivolous lives of the childfree. So I bit the bullet, and gave her my name, and - it turned out - some quotes for the article.

The magazine arrived in the mail earlier this week. I read the article tentatively. She had written the article as originally envisaged, and I was accurately quoted, making at least one or two points I wanted to make. But there, in a magazine anyone in New Zealand might pick up, this month or for years to come in doctors' waiting rooms or fish and chip shops or Chinese takeaways, is my name, the name of this blog, and some of my history. I have generally kept this blog private. I guess that's blown now, as this magazine is the most widely read magazine in New Zealand (according to its own publicity).

Two things grated a little with me. The first was referring to my ectopic pregnancies as miscarriages. As someone who spent years volunteering for an ectopic pregnancy organisation, ignoring the difference just feeds the ignorance of the population, and this ignorance can, in fact, be very dangerous, even lethal. Still, I guess it was incidental to the topic of the article, so I can live with it.

The second jarring note was seeing my age in black and white. I don't feel that old, and seeing it in print was - laughably, I guess, considering it is no surprise to me -  quite shocking!

I don't have a link to the article yet. I am told that it will become available once the magazine is off the shelves in about a month, and will make it public here. For any kiwis reading this, the magazine is the Australian Women's Weekly (NZ edition). Feel free to read it!I actually think that No Kidding women sit confidently and comfortably next to the inevitable gushing about little Prince George and Princess Charlotte and their mother (who, of course, features on the cover) that is the main fodder of a women's magazine.

The whole point of this post though, is how pleased I am that a major women's magazine has focused on the sheer number of women who don't have children, and highlighted some features of our lives, that others might not have considered. Finally.

13 comments:

  1. Congratulations Mali on sticking your head above the parapet in a bigger way. It's a big step & I applaud you for taking it. I know you feel nervous now but you won;t regret it.

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  2. Oh wow! Congratulations Mali!

    This is exciting news…. I can understand the nerves, but I’m stoked you’ve been given a chance to tell some of the story about childless women via a mainstream magazine. : )

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  3. Wow. I am in awe of your bravery to come out this way. This is an important topic and I'm so glad you agreed to be interviewed for it. Still, wow.

    It is wonderful to hear that the media is actually giving a more accurate depiction of those who are not parenting. Granted, there still needs to be a distinction between those who decided that right away vs those who are resolving after infertility, but it is a step in the right direction (the TIME article still gives me the jitters). May it be the beginning.

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  4. CONGRATULATIONS!!! Can't wait to see the link and read it. :-)

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  5. Huge huge huge congratulations on getting that story out there. For being brave and telling your story.

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  6. Wow, incredibly brave! And a win for the childless. Glad the writer got it mostly right, and believe me, my age keeps shocking me too! One off topic takeaway is that the name of the magazine is Australian, and they make a NZ edition - that seems like it would be a bit insulting, but I don't know because I'm a Yankee :D

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    1. No, you're right! There is a magazine "New Zealand Woman's Weekly" too. I think they're all owned by the same company.

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  7. So cool! And so brave! I can't wait to read the article!

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  8. Congratulations! Can't wait to get the link.

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  9. Congrats!!! This is a huge step forward for living child-free. Bravo to you!

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  10. Congratulations! How awesome that such an amazing voice spoke for no-kidding women everywhere. I'm so glad that found you and that you were able to contribute to the piece. I hope I can read it someday. ;)

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  11. I am so proud to say I "know" you. What a brilliant and eloquent spokesperson you are. Hope to read the article soon!

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  12. I too am in awe of your bravery -- and thank you on behalf of us chickens, lol. ;) Congratulations!! I would love to read the article when it becomes available online.

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