Monday, 1 December 2014

#MicroblogMondays: The future we can't have

When I was grieving the fact that I would never have children, I often admonished myself for what I felt was this self-centred grief. Then I saw this quote.
"The most painful state of being is remembering the future – one that you can never have."
Kierkegaard
It reminded me that I had lost something, and that it was okay to grieve. Oddly, that validation made me feel better too. So if you are grieving now, just know that we know it hurts, and that it is okay to grieve.

Know too though, that after a while you will stop remembering the future that you can’t have, and you’ll start looking forward to the wonderful future that you can have. Both your new future, and the shift of focus, are worth celebrating.


14 comments:

  1. This is a wonderful quote. One that helps me during this time of transition. Thank you for it.

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  2. This is a great quote, and a welcome reminder for me right now. It's true - once we validate a thing as worthy of our emotions, it's all the more easy to become unstuck.

    Thanks for sharing.

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  3. You always have the best quotes!

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  4. What a wonderful, thoughtful post.

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  5. Wonderful quote. Thank you for sharing.

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  6. It's a great quote. And a great reminder.

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  7. I echo everyone else - fantastic quote. I think grieving the future you'll never have is such a huge part of an out of the normal spectrum of life loss, as well as one that is all too often overlooked.

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  8. Yes, I really love this post. Once upon a time, I envisioned a future so clear and so real to me, that it was like a death to me when it didn't turn out that way I pictured it, so much so that I almost missed out on what I did have - which was amazing.

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  9. perfect quote to describe how I've felt so many days as of late. R often says to me to not look back at the past, and i've never been able to aptly described that i am not really looking back at the past or mourning for the past - I'm grieving for what could have been, not so much what happened.

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  10. Giving myself permission to and the being able to grieve lost dreams was immensely important as part of my healing journey. The quote is spot on.

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