29 May, 2011

More things I'm missing

I recently blogged on some things I would be doing if I had children.  It was a list of warm and fuzzy stuff, the baking, the knitting, the playing hopscotch or singing songs.  But there’s another list of things I would be doing if I had children. Part of accepting my life without children is acknowledging that having children isn't always easy or pleasant, and being honest about feeling happy about missing out on these things. 

In particular, in a quick list, I am not sorry to be missing out on:
  • Sleepless nights, and early mornings 
  • Using all my our available annual leave  to cover school holidays and days off for sick kids. 
  • Changing nappies, wet beds, cleaning up vomit, and all the other excrement-related tasks that parents have to endure
  • Loud, wriggling, children.  I’m quite a still person – I get that from my dad.  I don’t like lots of movement, and often wonder at the constant movement and wriggling of a toddler!  It pains me to see the wriggling, the knocks to their mothers’ faces, the pulled hair, ears, ear-rings (ouch).  
  • Spending money on new clothes and toys and birthday parties and goodie bags (I hate that concept)
  • Being friendly with the parents of my children's friends, rather than choosing my own friends 
  • Bright plastic toys in primary colours all over my house 
  • Little gates at the top of the stairs - I have four separate staircases in my house.
  • Noisy toys 
  • Children’s TV and music.  Though I did find recently that I quite liked Shaun the Sheep.  But if there’s such a thing as too much champagne, I’m doubly sure there’s such a thing as too much Shaun the Sheep.  My sister assures me of this.
  • Craziness at dusk (tired, crying kids, bathtime, bedtime etc).  Dusk is a time I really love for its peace and tranquility ... and feeling that it's okay to have a drink.


  1. I'd probably add on freedom to do a random trip wherever at short notice and not within the school holidays as one of the things I like. And being able to go out for dinner without sorting a sitter.

  2. Sushi girl, the things I CAN do because I don't have kids is my next post in this series. And those two are definitely on it!

  3. A couple of more things I also considered a positive for missing out on the kid thing:

    • the care, worry and cleanup when your kid is really sick... vomit, all of the of the other bodily fluids, fevers, hospitals - do-able if you have to - but you never will
    • no having to keep up a kid's routine when YOU are sick. They still need care and feeding even if you've got the flu yourself
    • no whining and complaining or tantrums
    • no parties or gatherings or horrifically boring plays or recitals. Sure, it would be fun to see your kid, but not the dozens of others for hours...
    • no childproofing. Decorate however you want.
    • being able to do whatever at the spur of the moment - you lose that ability once you have kids
    • www.shitmykidsruined.com - NEVER have to worry about this type of thing...

  4. Ah yes, lice next door just last week...

    I knew I could not survive all the plastic and electronic toys in the house. Could. Not.