19 February, 2013
What is the single most important thing a person can do for themselves, once they've made the decision to let go of becoming a parent entirely?
Tracy of Belette Rouge was asked this at a symposium. I liked her answer, but it got me thinking about what mine would be. And I think I concluded that it would be simply be to forgive.
Forgive your body (or your partner’s body) for not being able to have children. It wasn’t your fault, it wasn't a punishment, it wasn't a short-coming. It simply was, as much as the colour of your hair, or whether or not you wear glasses, or how athletic you are, part of who you are.
Forgive yourself, and let go of the blame.
Forgive yourself for not trying to have children when you were very young. *
Forgive yourself for your financial limitations.
Forgive yourself for recognising your emotional limits.
Forgive yourself for not going to the ends of the earth.
Forgive yourself for recognising that your sanity is important.
Forgive yourself for recognising that your relationship(s) is(are) important.
* if this applies to you