When I saw this quote, I realised that it explains so much of the pain of those of us who can't have children - especially in the early days. If we believe that we are unworthy, then it is easier to think that others also see us this way. Holding onto our unworthiness just invites pain and judgement in, yet it is hard to let go, to be kind to ourselves, to stop judging.
Once we stop believing in our unworthiness, it doesn't matter what others think about us. We know, deep in our hearts, that worth or lack of worth has nothing to do with whether or not we could have children, whether or not we are parents. Realising this, believing it, lifts a burden and liberates us - from our own judgement, and from that of others.
' easier to think that others also see us this way '. No matter what ' this way is' I dare to add. We cannot always ask how others see us, but our own assumptions can hold us back indeed.
ReplyDeleteYes! This is a lesson that I seem to need to re-learn every couple of months because I slip back into judging myself, negative self-talk, etc. Hell, I'm sure you've seen how many times I've apologized for my feelings on my blog or hesitated to write something out because I fear the reception (which has always been completely unfounded).
ReplyDeleteCompletely true in all aspects of life. Too often I fall back into the pattern of feeling unworthy. Yet I need to remember that others usually fall in line with how I see myself. Parenting/having all the money in the world/being extremely smart/fill-in-the-blank doesn't equal worthiness. Worthiness starts from within. Thanks for the beautiful reminder.
ReplyDeleteFully agree. When I struggle with my inner self-worth, I tend to become defensive or reactive or both.
ReplyDeleteI love this, and that unworthiness spans all situations. I feel like this should be a required quote wherever people are building their self-esteem.
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