Last year, we were in Iceland and delightfully buffered from the day and all it brings, but this year I am unable to escape, and so I am currently trying to figure out how to maintain a level of control over the day and how it affects me. It is actually my husband's birthday this Sunday, and we've decided to go out for dinner the night before, to avoid the happy families in the restaurants, but this means we have no excuse but to spend time with his mother! The truth is that, of her four children (and their spouses), we are the only ones who will be with her on the day, and we want to do that for her.
However, I want to keep some of the day for my husband, too, so I'm trying to think of a way we can do both – do justice to his mother, but give him some special time too.
But I also want – yes, I want a lot! – to carve out some of the day for me too, because I'm not going to pretend that I don't feel ignored and isolated by society on this day, and forgotten by friends and family - that would dishonour my journey, and our losses. As I said recently to Infertile Phoenix, I think that the world wants us to assimilate and join in with the day, whereas doing our own thing, honouring our own lives (because nobody else will), is a legitimate a way to spend the day (or in my case, part of the day). It is in fact, one of the great freedoms of living a No Kidding life.
For the record, some previous M Day posts: