Monday, 23 July 2018

Nanette, Childlessness, and the Importance of Perspective

The world is talking about Hannah Gadsby’s Nanette Netflix special about her life as a comedian, a lesbian, a “not-normal.” It’s powerful and moving, at times funny, but at times deadly serious, and she made me think, and I hope many others.

As a childless woman, I know I am also a not-normal, although to a lesser extent, as I only stand out when asked the question, “do you have children?” So my No Kidding status helps me, just a little, understand what it means to look at the world from the outside, and most importantly, teaches me that not everyone views the world with the same perspective; though sadly I know there are many, many people who just don’t get it, and don't make any effort to understand.

For example, my MIL can never understand that it was okay that her daughters-in-law might have different tastes in art or clothing, and my BIL casually dismissed the often callous ways people with children treat or discard their childless friends, without even bothering to try to see something from our perspective. As Infertile Phoenix pointed out in an excellent post, her sister has never understood it either.

I hope though, that the more often people like Hannah Gadsby speak out about the way they are treated, then more and more people will start considering their family and friends and fellow humans as individuals, with different experiences and perspectives, and begin to show some sensitivity, some empathy.

Gadsby ends on hope though, saying, "there is nothing stronger than a broken woman who has rebuilt herself," and looking around this community, I have to say, I agree.

10 comments:

  1. I haven't heard of Hannah Gadsby before, I have just watched the trailer and loved it.

    I love her quote: "there is nothing stronger than a broken woman who has rebuilt herself,".... I agree with it !

    Yes, I also loved the Infertile Phoenix's post!

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  2. We saw this last night on Netflix! I had no preconceived notions about what I would hear -- Josh chose it and I only knew her name and nothing else about her or the special -- and it was a wonderful way to encounter it. It was incredibly powerful; I'm still thinking about it this morning.

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  3. I LOVED Hannah Gadsby and I've been thinking about it since we saw it last week.

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  4. Oooh, adding it to my queue. Great quote, great post from Infertile Phoenix. I also commiserate with being "other," with not quite fitting in the social norms, and I think it helps you to have more empathy for other people who are marginalized due to things beyond their control.

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  5. On to-view the list, for sure! And what a lovely world it would be if "more people will start considering their family and friends and fellow humans as individuals, with different experiences and perspectives, and begin to show some sensitivity, some empathy" ... and such a great quote from Hannah Gadsby. Reminds me of the post I wrote: "Strong at the Broken Places" (four years ago, already!) https://blog.silentsorority.com/strong-broken-places-motherhood/

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  6. I do not know about Hannah Gadsby but I get her quote - ""there is nothing stronger than a broken woman who has rebuilt herself". How I understand it is no one is normal in this world. We are prone to pass judgments about whosoever is not like us. And, also, certain relationships are sticky and they remain that way, no matter in whichever part of this world they exist.

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  7. That quote is perfect!! And thank you for the mention. <3

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  8. Beautiful post and so honestly put.
    People never understand choices and who we are. childless or childfree, it's hard for people to accept. I also wonder, why should I expect people to understand me. Is that even needed.

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  9. Thant you Mali for sharing Gadsby's quote! I love it and couldn't agree more.

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  10. I've been hearing rave reviews of this -- must check it out!

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