With an arts (history/political science) degree, a background in music and
languages, and the fact I married an engineer from a family of engineers, and
then worked with a company filled with hundreds of them, I have for decades
felt stereotyped as a flaky, illogical, subjective right-brainer. Despite the
fact that I was always very good at maths (and sciences till I dropped them to
study the more interesting - in my mind at the time - arts subjects), and that I am quite analytical in terms of
problem-solving, even whilst being empathic and intuitive, I never really thought about
how important facts, reasoning and logic are to me.
But in recent years, I’ve realised how much logic helps me
understand the world; if I believe X, then Y must follow. This was very
important in my healing. I couldn’t continue to tell myself that I must have
been judged unworthy and deserved this, when all the evidence in front of me
was that this is not how the universe works. I couldn’t tell myself that I
wouldn’t have been a good parent, when all evidence in front of me said that I
would have been no worse than any of my family or friends (let alone the truly
bad parents of the world), and so on.
So when you hear your own brain’s negative messages and
assumptions, and know they are causing you pain, try applying some logic. In my
experience, it shuts those messages down more than anything else, and
ironically, frees your mind to be creative and happy.
Used to play the flute and the bassoon, used to speak many european languages and studied physics ;-). And have to say that statistics did help me hurt less, stopped me from getting stuck at the 'why me' question. (and have to admit, also fuelled my idea that biology is messy. Much more so than math or physics)
ReplyDeleteActually, I'm aware that there is supposedly a correlation between abilities in music, maths and languages, but in a brief search I couldn't find anything on the internet, and besides, I'd run out of sentences for Microblog Mondays!
DeleteYou're right though - biology is very messy, in more ways than one.
My first major in college was physics (with the intention of going to graduate school for civil engineering). My second major was political science, but then I realized that my employment prospects with that degree were quite low. Finally I settled on education where I could dabble in the sciences but also help people. I've often been viewed as being flaky too, but I actually use a fair amount of logic in every decision that I make, but I just have the ability to look at facts and make a decision quickly, giving the appearance that I'm flaky. This trait helped us quickly make decisions regarding infertility treatment and look back on those decisions (mostly) without questioning or regret.
ReplyDeleteCompletely separate from the advice (which is sound), the opening of the post reminded me of Stephen and Jane Hawking, especially her transformation in Theory of Everything from arts to understanding her husband's world of science.
ReplyDeleteI have always been more of a right-brain type of person, and logic can be, at times, challenging for me. Thankfully, my Beloved is a super-analytical, logical thinker... so when those negative tapes start playing in my head, he can help me work through what I'm thinking and feeling, to see what is true and what is just garbage.
ReplyDeleteThis is so true. For me, I just applied "Well, life is unfair, isn't it?" So I really try to move forward with what I have, constantly striving to let go of my grip on the past.
ReplyDeleteI am also a humanities major, touchy-feely fuzzy person.....and very logical. (Other people tell me this all the time: I certainly don't always FEEL logical. I am very aware of my irrational side!) I agree logic has helped me get through the tough parts of life. I think being logical and rational helps one to step back from the emotional aspects and look at them from the outside, so to speak. When you can perceive something as separate from yourself its power lessens.
ReplyDeleteExactly! One valuable tool I learned from my infertility support group was countering negative thoughts. Is it true? Is it correct? What evidence is there? Most of the time, the answer is always "no."
ReplyDeleteCue "The Logical Song" by Supertramp in my head, lol. (You're welcome.) English & politics double major here. :) (Loved history too, but there were only so many majors I could fit in, lol.)
ReplyDeleteThere were some occasions in the past when I thought to myself, "Ah, that's probably why I don't get to have my own children" but I realized that it was purely my self-defense mechanism (to lighten the pain I was feeling), because as you wrote here, the universe doesn't make sense if we think of these things in terms of "who deserves this-and-that".
ReplyDeleteYes, I think being logical can definitely help re-center oneself when we get into a negative thought process. I try to use it when my emotions take off. I've found meditating and clearly my mind, followed by a logic "talk" with myself is a good way to get my brain calmed.
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